Monday, August 15, 2011

Sketch Book

This is from a older sketch book..As you can see I have not been posting very often.. It seems I just do not have the desire to create anything..It is as my muse has left me or maybe I have just left it.. So when I found this sketch I can not remember what I was thinking when I sketched it. but I do remember it was when my Mom was in the hospital the last time.
My Mom seems to be slipping away from me.. It makes me sad when I see her confused and  she can not remember just a few minutes ago.  I watch her sometimes and she just sits and stares at nothing for long periods of time. She also is in what they call the last stage of COPD . She can not do much except sit in her chair and just to get up and take a few steps makes her struggle to get air.. Now that her dementia is getting worse she does not understand why she can not do things like she use to do.. She will say things like I know I can still drive or I know I can plant a garden and then when I try to explain to her she does not understand.
It breaks my heart.
I suppose I am just tired my self.. I am not complaining, just tired and I think I could use some away time.  Just by my self to find me again.  Just a get away from the worries and the stress..Does that sound selfish?

Thanks for all of you who listen to me and I always appreciate every comment.
Have a wonderful week.